The Christmas Equivalent of the Peep

December 02, 2005 category: tmi

By now you know you can count on the intrepid Factoids crew to experience things both pleasant and not so you don't have to. To that end, and having nothing whatsoever to do with our own unfortunate chocolate-covered cherry addiction we've bravely sucked it up and purchased a box of Queen Anne Peppermint Dark Chocolate Cordial Cherries.

Evaluation began as soon as we could rip the cellophane wrapping off with frenzied fingers. Even though it was 8AM, yes. Shutup.

To properly grasp the extent and depth of our horror at the goo that subsequently filled our mouth, one must look at the difference between dark and milk chocolate:

Dark chocolate: Comprised of cocoa liqueur, cocoa butter and sugar.

Milk chocolate: All of the above, then adds milk and uses less liqueur than the dark chocolate.

Now, anyone who has ever seen/touched/tasted actual cocoa butter knows that it is not so much "butter" as "wax", with the attendant textural disadvantages and near complete lack of flavor.

So, yes, munching on one of these Peppermint Dark Chocolate Cordial Cherry is like munching on a wet, faintly chocolate-flavored, wax-covered cherry-thing. Not as gag-worthy as it sounds, but when compared to the sublime goodness that is the Milk Chocolate Cordial Cherry, it is a nightmare worthy of an appearance by Freddy himself.

Are we going to eat them anyway? You bet your ass we are.

Foto of the day: leaf man